Superbowl

Holidays/Tour went well. Hatred Surge/Mammoth Grinder split out soon.

Tape machine is in the shop for Sungod, hopefully have newest stuff recorded by summer.

Girlfriend, work and school are all well.

Windy and Carl - Drawing of Sound

http://www.mediafire.com/?yz2ugozo2mj

James Blackshaw - Celeste

http://www.mediafire.com/?gme2tmqmumw

Glenn Jones - Barbecue Bob in Fishtown

http://www.mediafire.com/?ibdmtjiyzyn

Kriegshog - LP

http://www.mediafire.com/?tsfz9d7dooox0dt

TV: Larry Sanders Show, Six Feet Under, Futurama, The Kingdom

Movies: Badlands, Barton Fink, Stalker

For sipping only

Won't have to be broke for much longer.
Supposed to play Fallcore in Houston this weekend.
Worried about some friends.
Forming plans for Sungod again.
Registered for music classes next semester, it's beginning finally.
Love shines through like warm sunrays through blinds, heating stripes on your goosebumped chest.
Thank you Deadwood, Boardwalk Empire, Mad Men, Entourage, Futurama, Eastbound and Down.

Going to start Rubicon and Breaking Bad soon. I've only seen the first season of BB all the way through so I'm excited to say the least.


Ennio Morricone - Controfase
http://www.mediafire.com/?osimkkdnqfr

He's one of the best composers I've heard to date, and rightfully so. If you're a fan of any of his scores(which, if you like westerns, you definitely are) you'll enjoy this. Not as jangly with the guitar work but very liberal with keys and arrangements.

5ive Style - S/T
http://www.mediafire.com/?nymnlxo2onk

Funky instrumental chicago outfit. Heard it by accident, loving it though. Good "put on" music.


Group Bombino - Guitars from Agadez Vol.2
http://www.mediafire.com/?sxnbnl1ujgm

A rhythmic upheaval from the sublime frequencies label. If you like drums, funk or poppy eastern music..this is your thing.

Mike

Eleventy

I was Waylon Smithers for Halloween. I spilled some pumpkin soup on my pants the night of, though..so I had to improvise and be Richard Gere with fake blood all over. I went to some parties, specifically some weird forest party where I got off the ground.

I hope I'm not jinxing anything by saying I'm happy with who I've been around for the past week.

This weekend should be the shit, playing FunFunFun Fest on Saturday, so lots of cool food and free beer..then an afterparty with Scream at Red7. Hatred Surge and The Impalers...yowza.

Also yesterday whilst coming down I recorded some Dead C/Charalambides free noise type stuff with Braden..which we don't get to do very often. I don't know if we'll use it for anything but we'll definitely post it online.

Speaking of music:

Reigning Sound - Too Much Guitar
http://www.mediafire.com/?jzghmqfteiz

This record is a rocker. Jangly rock riffs and killer beats. It's LOUD, so make sure you act accordingly.

Sir Richard Bishop - Polytheistic Fragments
http://www.mediafire.com/?mzq4ygngnom

SRB is a master of his instrument, ever since his days in Sun City Girls. This is another foray into his very ethnic mix of guitar styles. Dude is a master.

Otherwise I have a lot of complaints. If someone wanted to give me some money I'd much appreciate it.

Til next.

Tempourment // Sitting Duck

Non-interpersonal love is something that goes unnoticed when referring to the word "love." What do you love? I feel like I rarely see people I know glowing at the thought of something happening unless it's social. Excited, sure, but not so much with an air of aloofness(aloofness?)..sitting above all the concerns and grievances of their day-to-day. Not that this is absent, but I don't think I see it enough. This may even apply for myself, didn't Jung suggest that observations are usually turned inward? Some old fuck did, I don't remember. Once there was an impression made of me where someone kept talking about their drums and how loud they are...So I'm guessing my "love" has definitely transferred itself publicly to others' knowledge. Among others..I have a fleeting love for film. It comes and goes.

I think I refer to passion too much as a gauge of worth rather than a point in someone's development. I don't care as much about the things I used to care about, and I care about things I didn't care about before. People changing is really the thing to get used to. Lately, some people close to me have undergone drastic changes(according to themselves) and I'm seeing the glow emerge once again. I want to live parallel to those I care about, if the stuff of life is change.

Bill Frisell w/Dave Holland & Elvin Jones

http://www.mediafire.com/?znzhkizntyy

^^Good guitar/jazz record. If you don't like Elvin Jones' drumming, you can pretty much stop saying you like drums around me. While he's not as wild as he was in his Impulse days on this record(came out like 9 years ago), he definitely holds his own. Frisell's guitar work is soothing and tense. If you like acoustic guitar, jazz or any of Frisell's work on Earth's Bees Made Honey in the Lion's Skull, get this.

Totalitar - Luftslott EP

http://www.mediafire.com/?5nwljmomnjt

^^Just some dbeat for yaz.

Can - Soon Over Babaluma

http://www.mediafire.com/?3kmilzjgyuw

^^

Even if you don't think you like krautrock, take a listen to these grooves and say you're not stoned.

Mike

Resonance

Played a house show Friday, haven't done that in a while. Was too good.

Dabbling in rye whiskey.

Pelt - Empty Bell Ringing in the Sky
http://www.mediafire.com/?jntddzigyj0

This record is an old favorite. Kind of obvious, and it's definitely no Ayahuasca but it's beautiful natural drones from Jack Rose's old band Pelt. Listen for deep inner beauty.

Mississippi Fred Mcdowell - Steakbone Slide Guitar
http://www.mediafire.com/?c1mzmdgbnn2

Fred Mcdowell has become a new favorite of mine. Giving me insight to vocals and slide guitar that I didn't think possible. If you like this album check out I Do Not Play No Rock and Roll.

I've been recording with Sungod a little bit. Just demoing/fleshing out songs. It's going better than ever and Braden's engineering has only gotten cleaner and more rich.

I'll be up and down the west coast in January, which excites me. Some awesome weather and a good time to be out on tour. I had originally planned to go to Fairbanks, Alaska in January but that surprise plan got nixed. Regardless, I will be in great weather with most of my favorite people. There is no feeling bad about that.

Feel right.

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I've been having trouble saying what I mean. It's so frustrating. You can see the reactions people are giving and gauge every misunderstand you're putting across.

I found out yesterday that no one in my family, outside of some distant-to-me cousins, has graduated from college.

My problem with communication is hindering my ability to write. I know that I have songs and stories but I can only get so far. The jumble and mess of being in a house with 4 other people makes this a constant chore. I can barely hear myself think in my room. I can feel myself breaking apart.

I need to make myself alive. I live in the past and future when relatively the only controlled period is now. There's no argument or really even reason to mention that fact. Coming to grips with the other perceptions and areas of control in my life is proving to be so difficult. I'm trying to make myself selfless. I want to be able to only receive signals and respond to what others are seeing, due to an insensitivity that i've recognized in myself. I feel like keeping things to myself and only thinking of what I think is killing my connection with my life.

Unfortunately, I think being raised in a guilt-ridden environment doesn't help much. I don't want to feel like some dying explosion, burning less and less as time goes. Absorbing less and slowly growing darker and colder...

It feels that way, but I think it's just because new things are on the horizon. In the face of change, while I cower and become brittle on the inside, I adapt and become more myself.

been listening to:
Vic Chesnutt
Thee Silver Mt. Zion....
Miles Davis(first-retirement era stuff)
Lloyd Miller
Barn Owl
Spacemen 3
Sleep

His hide is stretched and charred on the edges
pebbles for knuckles
and when he's weak he coughs up the darkest obsidian shades of oil

You have to gnaw on the wood to whittle a tongue
The splinters will keep your words short
Your blisters will silence you

twenty-three

Last month was my birthday. On my birthday I was greeted with breakfast at work, some recognition via desk decoration and a cake baked by one of my roommates when I got home. Along with much needed company.

The day itself had some hollow moments that were a little too glaring to ignore. This isn't anything new, I suppose.

Lately I've missed my family quite a bit. My father currently lives near the Pacific rim with my little brother. My mother is quite busy with her new position that requires tons of travel. And even when she is home, in Dallas which is only a 4 hour drive or so, I don't have a car to make the trek. I'm not sure what it is but sometimes there is just this overwhelming feeling of loss when talking to the people you grew up under. Like there's no more building and you have to take what you can get for any growth as a person.

I've been playing a lot of guitar. And since I actually did get that steel kick, I've been playing drums more and more. It's hard to be in the daily grind but the sun is out less and the wind blows so I don't feel as trapped. Stress at work combined with little to no time to myself has been a jading experience. I'm working my way out of it but it's like trying to crawl out of a muddy ditch. Every time you reach you just pull more down on top of you.

Enough personal talk though. Let's talk records I've been listening to.

Natural Snow Buildings - Shadow Kingdom

Disc 1: http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?0uzdtiucyjm

Disc 2: http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?nflyozyyjny

Organic drone duo from france. They create atmospheres like no other. This is new and their first proper LP. It's a 3-LP. Here is a mediafire of the cd version.

Steven R. Smith - Cities

http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?tyy0uynkwyd

One of my favorite guitarists in recent times. Very dissonant, like a score to a void. Lots of brilliant instrumentation and dynamics. This is his most recent release.

Also been jamming:

Spiritualized - Abbey Rd EP

Bill Frisell - Disfarmer

Slayer - Hell Awaits

Venom - Welcome to Hell

Eyehategod - Dopesick

Barn Owl - bridge to the clouds

stay healthy

Nossa Bova

It's been over a year since I've written in this.

Here's what's happened:

Living situation:
-stayed in Austin
-Lived in a cheap house on the east side with no a/c, a faulty foundation and right next to the railroad tracks. Sean and Greg(Odhinn) lived with us until about January and then broke lease and moved out. We had one more roommate until about June. Moved out last weekend.
-Currently live in a house on the Northeast side with Fat Zack, Braden, Bill Money and Mike McHale. It's the shit.

Work:
-Have worked up to being an Eligibility Clerk at Boon-Chapman. It's a third-party administrator for health insurance. It's a steady job with alright pay.
-Currently looking for supplemental income, but haven't figured out what I can do around here quite yet.

Extra-Curricular:
-Joined Hatred Surge, a powerviolence band originally started by Alex Hughes. Used to be just him but he asked Ulsh and I to play on the first LP. We just got back from supporting that LP, and I'm very happy to be on it. This is the band I get pissed and play fast in.
-Odhinn disbanded a little while before Sean and Greg moved out.
-Started Sungod with Braden. A lot of Odhinn's sound transferred over(moreso the improvisation element)..but basically it's a two-piece noisy psych-rock band. That's the band I lose myself in.
-Have been writing more in screenplay format. Nothing too exciting, in my opinion, but I've been working on it.
-Currently seeking out stainless steel drum shells
-Currently picking up guitar again in a serious way, thanks to FZ

Lovelife:
-Not much to report. Have "seen/dated" some different girls in and around Austin but nothing serious. Usually just a few dates or hanging out spread out over the course of a few months. Doesn't look like much is going to change on that. Still don't really know what I want whatsoever. I guess that never changes, though.


What with having to re-assemble my life after tour last year and take responsibility as far as paying bills and not living on couches; I've had to simplify my priorities quite a bit. There is a steady climb in my self-control over my own angry and anxious nature. Being on the road recently has put more in perspective. I wasn't scared of coming home. That could be attributed to me actually having a home to come back to this time, I'm guessing.

My only problems lately lie in the expectations of others, rather than any of my own. So these are not real problems except in their minds. I feel like people make it a point to be unhappy if they don't know all the details. More and more my peers get wrapped up in what they think should be happening in their lives. While one obviously should have goals, the lack of patience and the act of spreading oneself thin seems to really effect one's soul. At the end of the day the only thoughts they ponder are how to be prepared for tomorrow. Being sure to step over all of your conceived problems, fast-tracking to your own last days with the final product steadily in mind.

I've been under the impression that, if I work towards this picture in my head of where I'd like to end up..who I want to be, I end up missing out on everything that's not pictured. Trapped in that frame of mind, so to speak. Simply put, I am able to relax a lot more now with this attitude. I try not to let my ego control me.

Heavy rotation in the past few weeks:



More later.

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cold as hell

me taking pictures
snow in syracuse
show picture from boston
sleeping in albany
street at night in albany
basement show in syracuse

breakfast served up right in albany

Leaving in a week

this is a piece of my skull that was torn out.



this is where i slept while in austin.


this is what i've been listening to

I'm back
it was an incredibly important thing to get away for that long. Some things didn't go as planned,but good came from it. we sounded better than ever, i saw more places than i cared to(but without the shitty ones,the spectacular ones wouldn't be as such), and i think i can honestly say the dudes in the band are my friends now.

above is like 1 of......12 pictures i took. all bad, all within three days out of 7 weeks....that is a long damn time man. It has been decided that next year we are venturing to europe,recording,among other things that i've dreamed about doing.(i've recorded just nothing with the likes of kurt ballou,i mean jesus fucking christ)

so i come back to you texas...naked, in my room, listening to a 1.5 gig carepackage of music delivered by my friend braden. two days before i move to the almighty austin to become employed,and enjoy my time off whilst bettering myself in ways that i've already decided.

tonight i saw my whole family and it seems more and more that they are concerned with seeming happy than actually doing so for themselves...i guess that's either me getting older and happier, or it actually happening.

i have about 13 pounds of laundry to do, all soaked in sweat and black. tomorrow i have to go sort out my passport, buy new clothes to work in(and just wear in general..i have no winter clothes that fit), and pack my things for the journey on sunday.

i will be living with my friend matt needles. one of a handful of dudes in texas that i can truly say that i connect with on more than just one shallow level. it's exciting, i would probably choose him as a room mate, but he is nice enough to extend his living room to me nearly free of charge. perhaps he is lonely and in need of a real dude.

i am already itching to find out what the band is going to do next. it feels so powerful and amazing to be delved deep into a blinding collision of intensity and sound. the days that i felt it, i really felt it, and there were many.

i strive to be nothing more than a name on a memorial wall of contributors to the noise against relaxation and recreational music.

"chill music"
"music to sleep to"

suck my dick if that's what you want music for. if it doesn't excite every single sense of you, it's not worth listening to.

also i have a girlfriend.

out

In about one week's time i'll be heading out on the road from San Antonio for about two months. That is a long time, my chops will improve greatly, i will lose weight from malnutrition, i will make better friends with those in the van and around the U.S., and I will go broke. I will pee in bottles, i will masturbate in public restrooms that i find clean, I will not see a familiar face sans band, I will probably watch magnolia and blade runner about 20 times.

It's more than exciting, it's the life anyone should live for their passion.

Of course doing so makes me wonder about other aspects of my life...finances,education, women....let's go through each for a second.

finances..i have no savings. i have no money whatsoever. i was barely able to scrape together enough to eat for the next two months and even then it might not be enough. my car almost got repossessed, i owe the state of Texas for four speeding tickets, i've sold pretty much everything i have of wordly value besides what i use at home to keep myself entertained and not going out....But with finances it's usually correctable....so naturally i'm not worried about my debt.

education? you can always go to school but i really don't want to be taking basics still when i'm 24...but really...to travel the world and do what i'm best at in front of complete strangers for money...really just seems a lot more important when you're idealistic about the arts, like myself.

women...haven't tried to date a girl in about a year, and it was like 6 months before her...i really just...don't care...although it's starting to feel like time to pursue someone. Should i though? It's so much trouble, i won't be really..STATIONARY for the next two months,and who even knows during the next year. Not to mention i think i've been striving to make myself more unattractive by telling whatever jokes i want, acting like a nerd, and just wearing whatever is folded on my floor..i'd really have to try i guess.

see ya in a various amount of days america.